The short answer is yes, you can be in love with someone and still cheat on them, and here’s why… (I hate to be the bearer of bad news btw).
Are you feeling the destruction of being cheated on, and asking yourself how this could have happened when you believe that your partner loves you?
Or are you the person who’s cheated on someone you believe you love?
If you’re in the former camp, you’re feeling destroyed, empty, angry, disbelieving and experiencing the dreaded loss of what you thought life once was, but now isn’t.
If you’re in the later campground, you’ll be feeling guilt and shame over what you have caused another person to feel, perhaps confusion and the steal of reality now bearing down on your shoulders, like it’s almost crushing you.
In two decades of working with infidelity, I’ve discovered that cheating can, and does happen between couples who love each other deeply and unconditionally and here’s why…
Cheating is not always about a lack of love or dissatisfaction for one’s partner. In some instances, it is but in many other instances it is not. It’s also often not about the quality or the amount of sex they were getting, or not getting.
I’ve discovered that in many instances, the cheating on someone you love, is not about the partnership or the relationship at all.
Sometimes the cheating is driven largely by the inadequacy of the person who cheated.
In these instances, the pathway forward is to assist the person who cheated to recognise what the original driving forces were, or continue to be. Only then, can you together or separately, develop a plan to move forward.
For most couples, the entire journey is highly emotionally charged and my experience tells that in most instances this is hard for the couple to do on their own.
Get help from a third party to ensure you can both communicate what you need to in a safe manner.
Call Therapy Lounge now. We have no time barriers… call right here, right now. We’ll walk beside you and get a plan so both of you can move past the current trauma and figure out where the future is going to be.