How To Build A Strong Relationship
If you want to know how you can build a strong relationship, watch this video
Hi there! We’re talking today on how to build a strong relationship. After all, if you are intending to be in yours for the long haul, it’s great to know that you can do things that aren’t very difficult, that can just get you that really, really fundamentally strong relationship that will see you through most issues that will come up in the future. I’m Terri O’Reilly and I have been a therapist helping couples navigate relationship issues for well over a decade now.
So let’s have a look at the first thing that you can do to build that relationship even better than what you’ve got now. I see a lot of couples in therapy that have a fundamental need to be right and usually it’s that fundamental need to be right that creates issues and conflict and arguments in their relationship. And what I see in healthy couples that can navigate this really well, you notice this idea that they have that there’s something bigger than them. That the relationship is a third-party entity that’s bigger than each individual, and they tend to focus on that and they tend to make their decisions, put their preferences and have most of their thoughts focused on the idea, that the relationship is the important thing. It’s not about what I want, it’s not about what my partner wants, but they understand that they’re working towards and they need to nurture that bigger entity. It’s a shift in thinking I think, for most people in relationships.
Particularly, these days we come from very individualistic views that our needs come first and that we need to get our needs met mostly or often at all costs, but if you can shift that paradigm just a little bit and look at the relationship as that third-party entity, and understand that that’s what you’re working towards. The consideration of that third party entity, and what goes along with that too is this fundamental understanding that you don’t need to be right.
We’ve got that saying: Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? If it really comes down to the health of the relationship, being right really doesn’t matter. They’re the things we need to put aside because they’re the individualistic viewpoints. So, think about your relationship and have a look at whether you can take the focus off your individual needs, and focus on the health of the relationship as that third party entity. Nurture that and drop the need to be right but enhance the need to nurture the beauty that is the relationship.
Have a look around the website TherapyLounge.com.au. I’m Terri O’Reilly and I’ll talk to you next time. Bye.